WATAH!
Recently at work, because of my inconspicuous location I was put in charge of looking after the card for someone’s 15-year anniversary. Someone casually asked me if so-and-so had signed the card, so I replied, “Oh I dunno… I’m just the gate keeper.”
Which was hysterically echoed as, “THE GATE KEEPAH!”
Another time, also at work – did I mention this is my Canadian work, where they all have funny accents? – someone asked me, “Josh, say ‘water’.”
“Water,” I said.
“WATAH!” was once again echoed.
And I dreamt of cultural harassment laws that operate the same way as sexual harassment laws, which exist only in a world where I’m not forced feel like an Australian clown.
The reason we were talking about water, though, is because I was disgusted at the way water is wasted here. In fact, I raised the issue of water with the dude who mocked my “watah” because he left the tap running while he ditzed his way around the kitchen.
Coming from a country experiencing severe drought, I told him, you shouldn’t waste water like that. “I’m sorry,” he said, blankly, ingenuinely. While the water still ran.
There are small visual postcards that remind me of pre-drought Australia everywhere, from sprinklers to the OMG YOU CAN’T DO THAT hosing of driveways.
Canada is different to Australia though – they seem to be under the impression that their water supply is infinite. The poor bastards are snowed on for a majority of the year, so have a seemingly endless amount in their reserves from all the melted snow water.
I have read though that water is going to become the greatest commodity in the world as the population explodes and drinkable water becomes scarce. (Haven’t these people seen Tank Girl?)
So I guess it’s up to me to be this country’s water defender. I’m sorry, that's WATAH DEFENDAH.
Which was hysterically echoed as, “THE GATE KEEPAH!”
Another time, also at work – did I mention this is my Canadian work, where they all have funny accents? – someone asked me, “Josh, say ‘water’.”
“Water,” I said.
“WATAH!” was once again echoed.
And I dreamt of cultural harassment laws that operate the same way as sexual harassment laws, which exist only in a world where I’m not forced feel like an Australian clown.
The reason we were talking about water, though, is because I was disgusted at the way water is wasted here. In fact, I raised the issue of water with the dude who mocked my “watah” because he left the tap running while he ditzed his way around the kitchen.
Coming from a country experiencing severe drought, I told him, you shouldn’t waste water like that. “I’m sorry,” he said, blankly, ingenuinely. While the water still ran.
There are small visual postcards that remind me of pre-drought Australia everywhere, from sprinklers to the OMG YOU CAN’T DO THAT hosing of driveways.
Canada is different to Australia though – they seem to be under the impression that their water supply is infinite. The poor bastards are snowed on for a majority of the year, so have a seemingly endless amount in their reserves from all the melted snow water.
I have read though that water is going to become the greatest commodity in the world as the population explodes and drinkable water becomes scarce. (Haven’t these people seen Tank Girl?)
So I guess it’s up to me to be this country’s water defender. I’m sorry, that's WATAH DEFENDAH.
Tank Girl... now theres a great movie if I ever saw one.. I think it was...
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Yeah it used to be one my favourites! Haven't seen it in years though...
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